- Home
- /
- Latest Voices
- /
- Page 121
Latest Voices
The Center of Everything
The call came at midnight. “He died,” the voice on the other end said. No emotion.
“How are you, Alice?” I asked.
Medical School
Wake-Up Call
Perspective
“Your ovaries never developed.”
I am trying—and failing—to wrap my mind around those four words, to grasp the weight of their meaning, but every time I try to speak or swallow, the sharpness of the word “never” lodges in my throat. Never, meaning never counting the number of fingers on an ultrasound, never feeling the flutter of little toes against your abdomen, never arguing about whether you prefer the name Sophie or Sophia, never wondering if your baby girl will recognize your voice when you get to hold her for the first time.
Before Ultrasound
Lifted in my hands, his tone is great, his gaze intensely locks on mine. Put back down, his arms and legs flail enthusiastically. Cheeks are chubby, soft skin is pink. He passes the gestalt test – no worrisome sense that something is not quite right.
The Phone Call
“Dr. Eisenberg, line 6, Dr. B,” I hear over the office intercom. What? The chairman calling me?
And in that split second, as I braced for impact, my life flashed before my eyes. What did I do? My mind could only fathom the worst.
Untitled (A Medical Student’s First Patient)
I did make that first cut and many more afterward. I didn’t pass out, and eventually my heart stopped pounding when I picked up the scalpel. As time went on, we learned an impossible amount about the way humans are made, the way the pieces fit together. That was your gift to us, and I want to thank you.
Though I must admit,
Riñones al Jerez
“You do not need an MRI,” I told my father emphatically as he stood in my living room, explaining to me that his beloved doctor had ordered this for his low back pain. He was hoping for a quick fix before meeting his brother in Spain. “You need physical therapy.”
I dislike playing doctor to my family, not trusting myself to dissociate emotion from evidence, but this was just too much. Sure, his back hurt him sometimes, but there was nothing to suggest anything dangerous going on, nothing an intervention would fix. Nothing but the dreadful aches and pains
Knowing When to Let Go
Subscribe
Get the latest issue of Pulse delivered to your inbox, free.
