fostering the humanistic practice of medicine publishing personal accounts of illness and healing encouraging health care advocacy

Disaster North

Tuesday morning, Marcus holds his shoulders like a question mark. The intake nurse
marks the calendar: Thursday—property destruction.
She’s never wrong.

This is what the body learns:
to taste copper before the lockdown bell,
to pack your things before anyone says transfer,
to know which

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Home Visit

You passed the limits
of my knowledge with your
most recent diagnosis, pills and prods
now the specialist’s domain. I hold
your hand and listen. My stethoscope
curls in my pocket, dormant
as a sleeping cat.

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Biopsy

Either nothing
or leukemia or nothing or
multiple myeloma or nothing
a tumor, the long needle, the shattered
bone, the blood cell count, the EKG, the EEG,
nothing, the cyst, the rash, the clot, the scream, the sigh,
the “let’s just be sure,” the

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Still Cold

On his birthday, my father tries
to eat osso buco with its tiny marrow-spoon.
He scrapes at the shank, a felled tree trunk
on his plate, raises the shreds to his lips
until we cry out, watching them spread
over the table like shame.

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To My Son, Stillborn, January 16

Your death seared my cells,
fired them with you;

in one way, you left
me as your body slipped

from mine, 41 years ago,
but in another way, you

entered me;

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Catching Cold

It’s sleeting outside but
I slant through the slashing
Slivers of ice unscathed

An old woman is waiting inside
Saying you’ll catch the death of you
As she hands me a heavy blanket

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Another Husband in the Waiting Room

From the sixth floor of the surgery tower
two blocks from a frozen Lake Michigan,
I can see a small lighthouse but no boats.

The overcast lake is speckled blue and white
near shore, but far out on the horizon, it’s dark
like a new bruise

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Common Cause

Sitting before me
I measure his scars and record the beatings
He is broken

Not just his teeth and back, his will is shattered
I ask his plans should he be granted asylum
He has none

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Time & Again

COVID wards 2020-2021

For the sake of the present / let’s just admit that thigh-deep mud & poison gas & running into machine gun fire / still belong to us all the glass-eyed / survivors who said sundown was almost worse than morning slaughters

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Lessons From the Night Sky

It has recently come to your attention that asteroid 2022 AP7 is headed towards the earth. ◙ Despite your attempts at distraction, your mind repeatedly imagines the collision. ◙ Experts call 2022 AP7 a planet killer–then say not to worry as it could be many generations before this is a

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Infinite Excuses

A long day makes me want to get home, and I’ll have
to explain, again, why I’m late to pick up the kids. The merge
onto the Expressway slows. At least the drivers stay patient,
taking turns. We keep stuttering forward until I see the cause

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Three Needles

First the catheter, slimmest filament,
slid in by expert hands

The next needle delivers
a pillowy somnolence
your russet-furred rabbit face falling
gently into my cradling palm

Then the final dose,
doctor calculated for your now boney, bunny frame

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