fostering the humanistic practice of medicine publishing personal accounts of illness and healing encouraging health care advocacy

fostering the humanistic practice of medicine publishing personal accounts of illness and healing encouraging health care advocacy

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Poems

What You Were Wearing

Theta Pavis

They handed me your clothes
the winter boots,
the dark, folded jeans in their
impossible size 5.

I put them in my trunk,
then drove around
orbiting your hospital like a
satellite sister.

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Restricted Parking

Daniel Becker

In silhouette, in pantomime, in slow motion,
she’s dropping him off, but instead of 

a see-you-later kiss, they slap palms, high fives,
except they miss–

twice the sound of one hand clapping–
and there they go again: arms raised, hands poised,

holding then un-holding their applause
as they deliver unto one another. Meanwhile, 

that’s my space they linger over.
A kiss is just a kiss, but this

is a circuit to complete, an orbit to repeat, 
a moment that needs time

the way a couplet needs to rhyme. 
Parting is to parking as sweet sorrow is to sour, 

and more so–trust me–if they’re here tomorrow. 

About the poet:

Daniel Becker practices and teaches internal medicine at the University of Virginia School of Medicine where, he says, “I am one of the few faculty who can’t complain about parking. I have a primo space.” 

About the poem:

“I have a soft spot for wives dropping husbands off, husbands dropping wives off and partners dropping partners off, and for that moment of separation, so ripe with promise.”

Poetry editors:

Judy Schaefer and Johanna Shapiro

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Elixir of Love

Howard Stein


(with apologies to Gaetano Donizetti and gratitude to Helen Fisher)

Oh dopamine! Elixir of love!
Beloved catecholamine neurotransmitter,
Child of the hypothalamus–
To you I owe all passion.
In you are all the wiles of Venus,
The drunken orgies of Dionysus.

When I fall in love,
It is you, phantom brew,
Whom I truly cherish.
My beloved in flesh
Is only a stand-in
For the biochemistry between us.

Oh dopamine! Sly Trickster!
You are crueler than Narcissus!
It is not even my self,
But my chemicals,
Whom I most adore. 

About the poet:

Howard F. Stein PhD, a medical and psychoanalytic anthropologist, is professor and special assistant to the chair in the department of family and preventive medicine, University of Oklahoma Health Sciences Center, Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, where he has taught since 1978. His most recent book is In the Shadow of Asclepius: Poems from American Medicine, with a foreword by Jack Coulehan MD. 

About the poem:

The inspiration for this tongue-in-cheek poem comes from Helen Fisher’s essay “The Madness of the Gods,” which appeared in the January 2011

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Job Loss

Risa Denenberg

I’m no longer part of this operation.
I skulk back into hospital to hand over my name badge–
worn every workday for 12 years. Messy shame shines
on my face like spinach stuck between incisors.
It’s noon, people jam every hall, every sluggish line,
there are no smiles for me. I don’t want to meet the gaze
of anyone I know. 

I reflect upon peaceable Christmas shifts,
ham and mashed potatoes in the cafeteria, 3 AM.
Passing comrades in corridors, news matters
only to the extent it might toss a tragedy
onto our shore. Ours is no longer
the operative concept. 

Task done, on to another line to return my dog-eared
parking pass. Next stop, cashier, five dollar refund. 
Finally in my car, I lean out the window,
and hand the voucher to a parking attendant.
I am holding back tears now. Damn, I’ll miss this place.
Take care,
 he says. First kind words all day. 

About the poet:

Risa Denenberg is an aging hippie currently living in Tacoma, Washington. She earns her keep as a nurse practitioner and freelance medical writer. Recent poems with health-related

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Cardiography

Norma Smith

How the electrical impulse
begins in the small part
of the heart and provokes
the pumping
of the necessary

fluid, which will carry everything
we need
to live, everything
we can’t do without
those impulses
carried forward,

Carried down, 
around this body’s desire
to liveand move/about
a spark
in a small place.


About the poet:

Norma Smith has lived and worked in Oakland, California, for the better part of forty years. She has worked in hospitals her entire adult life, including a few years as an EKG monitor technician in an intensive care unit.

About the poem:

“This poem was written during the period leading up to my mother’s death from heart failure. I love how the body and its physiology lend themselves to metaphor, and how a line of poetry can illuminate that and help us see the whole person, the whole life, even as we’re focused on the body’s functioning in the moment.”

Poetry editors:

Judy Schaefer and Johanna Shapiro

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Witnessing Consent for an Autopsy

Patty Bertheaud Summerhays

“They just cut the abdomen like an operation, look in and sew him up. No one will know.”

I know the inside story–the body parts,
the heart, brain, liver, lungs,
kidney, spleen, bowel, and bladder
sliced on a cutting board
like loaves of bread.
The coroner donning a butcher’s apron
splattered with blood from the last
scrape of blade over bone,
slipping off the scalp like a mask.
The eyes stopping him 
like the end of sentences until
he doesn’t feel the frown of brow–
anger as he drills to its roots.

Emotions leaving both men
with a grasp of brain.

A slice of brain placed in formaldehyde
jiggles like a thought trying to collect its thoughts.

Every organ shredded and a piece
saved until the jar is filled with
a body of its own.
The leftovers gathered 
into a plastic bag and placed
back into the body
like a well-kept secret.

A secret longing for a slip
of the tongue.

About the poet:

Patty Bertheaud Summerhays received her MFA in poetry from George Mason University in 1991. She worked as an intensive-care nurse in hospitals in the northeastern U.S. and as a nurse and ESL teacher

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Escape to HuHot

Jennifer Frank

Hunched, shriveled, pinched
Enclosed in the metal prison of the wheelchair
You long to be free, unencumbered
By the oxygen tube connecting you to life

Each visit with me brings worse news
Creatinine up, red cells down
Carbon dioxide rising, oxygen falling
You have a medication deficiency

Once you were adventurous
Living life on the edge
For your generation,
You defied expectation

Now you are ending like
Everyone Else.
Hospital-home-hospital-rehab
Home-hospital-nursing home
Death is next

Your passions now are distilled into
Shopping at Walmart 
Lunch at HuHot Mongolian Grill
I have never been

While I recite the monotony 
End-of-life care
Advise hospice
Encourage compliance
Lecture about smoking
Offering nothing you want or desire

I imagine
Casting off the tubes
Tossing the meds
Lifting you from the prison-chair
Offering you my arm
As we escape to HuHot

About the poet:

Jennifer Frank recently transitioned from academic practice to full-time clinical practice with ThedaCare Physicians in Neenah, Wisconsin. “I write, in part, to help process the often difficult emotions that accompany being a family physician. It is a way to honor my patients and

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Please For Tonight

Andrea Wendling

Please for tonight
Just be my wife
She is my life, my center,
She is what makes me whole
And I am finding I cannot exist
Without her

Smell like her
Like hayfields after a day of hard work
lavender and milk baths
Warm breezes blowing through still forests
All of this mixed with the soap
That we shared
That now too slowly disappears

Touch me like she would
Like I belonged to her
Slow, steady, without surprises
Know instinctively when I need to be calmed
And understand when I need 
Your lips, your touch
So desperately that I cannot
Live in this skin
Without you

Feel like she does
Strong and slight
Your skin rough in places
Melting into my touch in others
Pull away from my lips
Yet fill my mouth
Your cross brushing my chest
As you rise above me

Melt into me
Sighing softly
Never talking
And for that moment
Completely believe
That I will simply 
Always be the one

Please for tonight
Become my wife
And help me to feel again
That my life is complete.

About the poet:

Andrea Wendling is a rural family physician in northern Michigan. When not writing poetry,

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Washing Feet

Robert Fawcett

Being thorough, I remove a holey sock 
to view a diabetic man’s filthy feet.
I use the time to complete our talk
of what drove him to live on the street
as I wonder how any of this can help.

While he tells me more of his medical past, 
I run warm water into a stainless bowl.
I immerse both his feet and begin to ask
myself what good it does for this poor soul
to allow himself to undergo this ablution.

Silently I sluice the water between his toes
and soap the crusty callous at his heel.
I marvel at his arch and notice how closely
it fits my palm. I know he can feel
this proximity too. He shuts his eyes.

Months of useless layers peel away,
revealing layers useless weeks ago.
Removing the tough brown hide of yesterday
yields clean pink skin, but we both know
this ritual will be useless days from now.

Still, this moment may withstand time’s test,
teaching us each lessons unknown before.
I learn the medicine of selflessness.
He learns what medicine is really

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