Please Give Me a Hug

I knew almost immediately that I was pregnant, and I knew remaining pregnant was not an option. I scheduled a D & C procedure at a local clinic, telling no one in my family. The only person who knew was the man involved, a man forty years my senior. 

The doctor at the clinic was kind, and the staff were caring. I don’t know how long I stayed in recovery at the clinic, but I vividly remember lying on a cot after the procedure. I vividly remember an attendant who came over to ask me gently if I needed anything. I needed so much at that moment, but I said “No.” With all my heart I wanted to say, “Please give me a hug,” but I shook my head “No.”

All these decades later, I still remember longing for a hug and not being able to ask for what I needed. I felt so alone.