waiting for the train


3 thoughts on “waiting for the train”

  1. Waiting for trains can often be an amazingly rich experience. In this poem it seems to “stand in” for all the things the poet may have waited for, and the ones still to wait for, where she may know the destination but not what it has in store for her. The moment is the present, as it should be in good haiku, but the mystery extends forward, backward and sideways, also as it should do in haiku. The line “water from the leaden sky” is a true line of poetry — perfectly suited to the form.

    1. Stephanie Friedman

      Thank you for your comments, Ellen Diamond. Of course, all of those things you said my haiku “should” do–and did– were not remotely on my mind. I was sitting on a bench on a railway platform, waiting for a train that would take me to Narita Airport and a plane for home, after spending nine days in Japan for a performance. I had fallen in love with Japan and was sad to leave. It was raining. I had the sketchiest understanding of Haiku, and just wanted to write a poem that would express my sadness.
      I’m glad you found my effort suitable to the form.
      S. Friedman

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